advice...

so today i was going through my boyfriend's phone cause i was bored and he has old pictures that i like to look at cause memories. anyways, after i was done i went to his internet browser and he had a tab open for a porn site.. before we got together i knew he watch the porn frequently and i expressed to him that i didnt like that he watched it so often and that id be okay with him watching it a few times in a month (cause period time and we both aren't comfortable for period sex) and as long as he told me. well i went through the history and found that he has been watching more than a fes months and he had lied and told me the last time he watched it was when we werent living together. i honestly felt hurt and had thought about killing myself( i have LOW self esteem and i tend to get let down and blame myself for a lot of problems.) he promises that he hasnt cheated on me or have been talking to other girls and he says that sometimes he doesnt even get aroused by the porn and that its more of a force of habit rather than he needs the pleasure and stimulation. he says that he doesnt even jerk off to it either. I'm really hurt by it and i don't want to leave him because hes my world and my everything but i cant let him keep watching it and feeling like shit about myself. am i maybe just overreacting too? please help me😭😭 (sorry im super emotional about the situation too because its been period week and our anniversary is supposed to be today 11/04)