Body epiphany


Idk I just wanted to create this post because I realized today, after 22 years, I'm finally in love with my body. I struggled so hard with my appearance when I was younger and I was constantly in the doctors office, nutritionists, working out all the time trying to put on muscle to put on weight because I was a green bean and I've always looked in the mirror and and at the worst, I would sob and self harm, at best, I would go "eh." Most people never thought I would be self conscious because I was "model thin" but that made them feel like they had the right to tear me down to build themselves up. They said I could take it because my body type was idolized (by a very small group of people might I add) at the time so I really couldn't complain about my feelings being hurt. Even when I got older and started to see progress after years and years of trying so desperately to change who I was, I was unhappy, I was chasing the unattainable. I didn't realize over the past year how much mental progress I started to make, I didn't realize my confidence was no longer fake and forced, but instead it genuinely started to seep out of every pore until a few days ago when I was walking through the mall for a quick errand to pick up a laptop charger and in those brief minutes, I was stopped 3 times by 3 different strangers to tell me I was beautiful. Nothing about my physical appearance had changed dramatically in a long time, and yet I had never gotten so much public attention before. I continued the next few days with a new awareness and noticed the only thing that changed was I had finally, not just accepted, but LOVED myself. My confidence had caused me to glow and radiate. I thought I was truly beautiful, and that was finally when other people started to think so too. I found myself no longer staring at other girls in envy of their big butts or full lips, it didn't bother me anymore to see a beautiful girl. I'm so incredibly happy to be me and feel blessed to wake up every morning not hating the girl in the mirror. I'm still able to see my flaws but now I like them more than the "good" aspects of my body. I've always heard women talk about this moment, but I really never thought it would be possible for me to be 100% happy with myself, but I really truly am now and I can only hope that every other girl will experience this feeling at some point 😊