My husband lost his job in April when I was four months pregnant. He has had a very successful career in finance and is now at the age/time in his career where he has always wanted to own his own business/es so has been trying to find something for sale that he is interested in acquiring. We are both financially blessed with good savings so we can afford for him to do this. Since then, we have had our wedding, honeymoon, he has had knee surgery, we were broken into and robbed, and I’ve given birth to our 8 week old baby - all of which he says have been major distractions to him working efficiently to find something. He will admit that he has not done the best job in utilizing his time or being consistent with trying to find a company to buy so isn’t as far along as he would like to be. This gets him depressed and demotivated.

My husband helped me enormously in the first two weeks of having the baby which was amazing as I had a c section with a tough recovery. Both our families live overseas so we have zero support network here or anyone to call on. We decided that I would care for the baby 100% so that he would be free to focus on finding a company to buy. I EBF but if am struggling - I will ask him to help with the baby but I try not to as even him putting down the baby to sleep seems to throw off his own routine and he gets distracted. I am completely exhausted (obviously I have a newborn ha!) and have little to no relief due to us being so far away from family. It also makes me feel very alone taking care of this LO all by myself - but at same time I love it and can’t complain at all!

My parents came for 10 days to see the baby (another distraction for my husband even though I told him this would be a great opportunity to get work done as my mother is here and I have all the support I need, but he felt obliged to entertain them/ be hospitable so didn’t do too much work while they were here) we live in a 2 bed apartment 1 bed for us, the other is the nursery/place where my husband works. Though he has also rented office space as being around me and the baby was a distraction to him. My parents stayed in an Airbnb directly opposite our complex - 30 second walk to ours so that we could all have our own space. Even while my parents were here, I ended up being more exhausted as my routine with baby was shot and I wanted to spend time with my own mother as I only see her once a year.

Now my husband invited his mother to stay with us for 8 days. He will admit that his relationship with her is strained and confessed that she was a neglectful parent to him and his sibling. She is now in her mid 70s and wanted to see her grandchild and I was surprised that he agreed to let her stay in our apartment. She said she did not want to inconvenience us so would sleep on couch. We ended up

Putting her on an air mattress in nursery so she could have her privacy and i moved all baby stuff into our room etc. it is an inconvenience. I’ve had to pay to put my animals in a kennel as she doesn’t like them. now my husband has decided that this is the week he needs to focus on finding something as he is nervous about our savings dwindling and he says he is getting extremely stressed because he hasn’t had the chance to focus at all. He wants to work all day and evening and leave me with his Mom who I have only met once before for an hour and honestly i don’t have a great impression of her due to him telling me how shit a mother she was to him. I’m exhausted I don’t want to entertain and spend time with this lady for 8 days alone by myself. My husband says this will be an opportunity for me to rest as she will take care of baby but she arrived yesterday and doesn’t know how to even he hold the baby!!!!! Plus I would never leave my baby alone with her. I don’t know her and also she is older and I can tell her mobility is not great. She also sat around while I made dinner and cleared up and said “I want to help

I just don’t know what to do” how about picking up a dish? And putting it in the dishwasher?

I spoke to my husband about it and he got really upset with me and told me I was being selfish and that I need to support him by handling his mom while he can go find us an income. Am I in the wrong? Am I being selfish for feeling way i do?