Hey.

my friend had a heartattack in my lecture today. She has a heart condition so it was always a possibility. she's stable and recovering now but i feel so crap. i froze. i literally went quiet and froze. i was asked to tell the lecturer and i couldnt. i did nothing.

i felt so lost today before it happened as two years ago was the terrorist attacks in paris, beruit and lebanonn. 2 years ago i tried to reach my internet friend in anyway possible. she was alive and far away from it but the fear is real.

i thought about grief and death and pain in those few moments of shock.

i just thought id be able to do what i needed to do in those moments where someone needs me but instead i must just freeze.