What advice do you wish you had as a FTM?

Question

With the abundance of information out there for first time moms, it's hard to sort it all out! To the veteran moms, what do you wish you would have known about pregnancy, labor, childbirth, or being a new parent?

Answer

Something I didn’t learn, but was already set on doing, and suggest to anyone; is to labor at home if you can. If you go into labor naturally, stay at home as long as you feel comfortable.
Also, don’t be afraid to use a pacifier if you need some quiet. It won’t hurt their latch. My daughter got one at five days old and hasn’t had any issues. 
Patience is the key to successful breastfeeding. Don’t let people tell you that baby isn’t satisfied with your supply before your milk even comes in. The first few days your colostrum is all baby needs. Don’t supplement so early. When your milk comes in, it starts regulating to what your baby needs. If for some reason they aren’t gaining weight, and your doctor suggests supplementing with formula, okay. But don’t just assume they need it. They will keep sucking because that’s how they tell your body to produce milk. It’s a hard road and the first few weeks are rough, but it does get easier.

Answer

You have never been as tired as you are the first month after having your child. Your parenting style is not going to be everyone's cup of tea. If you're feeling frustrated it's ok to put the baby down in a safe place and go calm down without feeling guilty. My boobs have never hurt as bad as when milk was coming in. I cried. If you don't think your child's doctor is listening to your concerns about your kid find a new Dr! PPD is real and it's not something to push under the rug. Make your child mind you from the minute they understand because it gets harder if you try when they are older.

Answer

We have 7. I wish someone would have advised me to slow down, nurse them longer and wait longer between each one. I love them and would still have wanted a large family. But the older ones are 16, 13, 12, 11, 10 & 9. Our youngest is 13 months and I have so much more time to enjoy the little moments with him. I also STILL nurse him and I never made it past 6 months with the others because well, at one point I had FIVE UNDER FIVE.

In short, I wish I had been told to slow down and savor every bit as well as breastfeed each to AT LEAST a year old.

Answer

Sex can induce labor. It did for me! 
Your water breaking will not be like the gush you see in the movies. It will probably just drip at least mine did. 
Contractions are a bitch. They hurt like hell at least for me they did. I lasted as long as I could without the epidural but dear lord it was such a relief when I got it. I was able to relax and prepare for the pushing! 
Get an app to track your contractions. It helps! 
Push like you have to poop. Literally that’s what you need to do. It may take you 10 minutes or it could take hours so be prepared for that. 
You don’t really need to pack a hospital bag for yourself. They have everything there for you. Your husband will need a bag though and you will need to pack a little bag for baby like going home clothes a blanket newborn diapers etc. I didn’t want to wear my own clothes because of all the blood. 
Speaking of blood there’s a lot. Like a lottt. 
The frozen pads are your life saver. They are amazing. Ask to bring some home!
If you are nursing speak to a lactation consultant!!! 
 
Don’t worry about keeping your house perfectly clean. That’s just too much stress
Breastfeeding is fucking hard and it would be so easy to give up but if you fight through it it is so so worth it
Ask for help! Don’t be afraid to ask for help you’re not a bad mother if you do. It takes a village. 
Don’t be afraid to let people hold your baby. It’s okay. If you don’t want them to kiss your baby’s face or if you want them to wash their hands before holding baby  just tell them. 
It is much easier to have your baby in your room as a newborn. I don’t agree with cosleeping but I had a rock and play and he was right next to me all night within my reach. To each there own though about the cosleeping. 
I wish I had prepared more freezer meals. Ain’t nobody got time for cooking with a newborn. 
If you are breastfeeding ask your s/o to change the diaper. At least he will be doing that to help if he can’t feed baby. 
Wake your husband up in the middle of the night. It’s his crying baby too. 
Take a shower. It’s good for you. Put baby in a swing outside your bathroom door. 
If baby is crying and you have meet all of his or her needs it’s okay to put them down safely and just walk away for a minute. We all need a moment sometimes. Newborns can be stressful. 
Hold that baby as much as you want. They are precious little things. Enjoy it! 
Okay sorry for all that but I thought it might be helpful! ☺️

Answer

A baby that sleeps will just sleep more. My MIL adamantly insisted that the reason my oldest son isn't sleeping well is because he's just not tired yet, I should keep him awake now during the day, make sure he's busy, and he'll sleep more. WRONG! Besides waking up for feedings when they're first born, let the baby sleep.

Answer

1.  You don’t need most of the baby stuff in stores. And buy used as much as possible - most baby things only get used for 3-4 months if at all!
2.  Seek out support groups (eg yoga class or doula while pregnant, new moms group postpartum or PEPS postpartum)
3.  Know the reliable websites to get info from (vs the inaccurate).  Kellymom is great for breastfeeding. I’m a side sleeper and starting getting recurrent plugged ducts once baby slept longer... taking lecithin stopped the plugged ducts. Life saver!
4.  Know there is no ‘right’ way to do birth, parenthood, etc.

Answer

Don’t stress over little things. If you clean it they will destroy it. Snuggle every chance you get. Always tell them you love them......It’s hard but you will survive. After one it’s a piece of cake( that you will hide to eat by yourself)

What advice do you wish you had as a FTM?

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