I feel crazy but also okay? Break up Advice needed!

Ashley

So my boyfriend of a year just broke up with me on our 13 month anniversary. I'll try to make a long story short but this is gonna get JUICY!

Okay so when we met it was amazing! Y'all know the puppy dog stage and shit where everything cute and there's no troubles 🌈🌈🌈 everything rainbow and Sunshine's. At this point I didn't have a second job I was currently only working from home. I work for my dad as he cannot pay a secretary so at the time he payed for only my phone.

Well then fast forward a few months and boyfriend gets irritated because I didn't have a car and we couldn't see each other during the week and he had to pick me up on weekends. So he wanted me to move in but knew I could not because I had to work for my dad. MIND YOU ALL I TOLD HIM ABOUT MY SITUATION FROM THE BEGINNING SO IT WAS NOT A SURPRISE I HAD NO CASH MONIES.

So to try and put an end to the fighting I went behind my dad's back and got a second job to start saving up for a car. Slaved for a few months and with the help of his parents finally got a car!

So I Start driving up on payday and every weekend so we can spend time together. At this point my dad is now paying my car insurance, phone, and any repairs the car has needed my dad has either payed for in full or help payed. So apparently driving up more isn't enough for him so he goes back to me moving in and he says "it's funny how my parents and I thought you were gonna move in after you got the car" But I never once said "After I get The car Im moving in " shortly after trying to figure out ways to live together he decided without me to move into his uncles and force our dog upon me and I have to have her at my dad's here. (which I don't mind at all but why wouldn't you talk to me first yaknow )

So then I find out I have Crohns disease! And it was really bad at first and I have been in and out of hospital more than enough times and after the first two times I was in hospital he would make me feel

Bad for being hospitalized which is something I cannot help! And I was just recently hospitalized for a month and missed work so I had no money!

So then I start back up at work again and I start saving money and I go over to his uncles where he is at now And his parents found a nice town house or something and he wants to get it and asked "so if I get it can you move in?" Which first of all he knows at this point I have NO money cause I was out of work for a month. And I can't leave my dad's business until he can pay someone and I cannot move it so I told him no. We had been fighting since and now he's told me he is done. That he doesn't want to go on any longer while I'm helping my dad.

So I have basically been crying the last few days from anxiety and this break up. I still love him and want to be with him which is why this hurts me so bad but i feel crazy because i feel like he should have just waited for it to work out. Even when i said i will save gas to drive he didnt want the miles on my car so i could not win. Should i feel crazy for wanting him back? Or should I feel normal because we broke up but he could have been more understaning about mine and my dads situation. I am just tired of being told i picked my dad over him when i didnt i just could not move because of money issues.

*UPDATE CAUSE I FORGOT*

He also said that we were on a break but were not broken up then went and opened his old fb to make it dating himself and didn't tell me. Then he acted as if he were single leaving all Relationship responsibility at the door!

253 views • 1 upvote • 11 comments

COMMENT (11)

Bl

Posted at
It sounds like he wanted to control like literally every aspect of your life. He did you a favor by breaking up with you because he would’ve NEVER been happy. Also you both sound really young, doesn’t sound like you should be moving in together anytime soon. Maybe his parents and him are part of a cult or something for them to be so obsessed with you 2 moving in together.

As

Ashley • Nov 18, 2017
Lmao in a cult!!!! Had me deadass dying. But I'm gonna be 22 in dec him 25 we really are still young

Je

Posted at
To b 100% honest he is a prick!!! U could do waaaay better!!!! The biggest red flag is the hospital, in Absolutely no way even if it was your choice to go should he be mad about it!!! Seriously there is a guy out there who will love u to pieces and spoil u rotten and this dude at it.

As

Posted at
You ladies are all so helpful! Lol'ed at the cult comment. It just hurts because I spent a year of my life loving someone for it to end like this. I didn't wanna start over but at this point I don't have a choice. He doesn't wanna wait for me to be financially stable and I'm not just gonna leave my dad when he could lose the house if I don't helps there is mo way he could run the business on his own

Je

Jenne • Nov 18, 2017
Men come and go but ur dad is family and he needs u. I kno a years is a lot but least u didn’t waste 5-10 years like many do

As

Posted at
Family comes first. He and his parents do seem a little too obsessed with you moving in. He seems too controlling and you dont need that kid of stress especially with Crohn's disease. I have Ulcerative Colitis (IBD) and stress makes me flare up. So im thinking stress may make your Crohn's flare up. The fact that he was not caring while you were in the hospital is a huge red flag. Like the other girl said, it seems like he will never be happy and nothing will ever be good enough for him. I know breakups are hard but stay strong and that sad feeling will eventually go away. You deserve someone who will treat you right.

Mi

Posted at
I'm just going work the flow.

Mi

Posted at

❤️

Posted at
Ho estly its kind of hard to guve advice without all facts. How old are you both? Have u discussed a future together? Are u serious enough to get engaged or married? Is your dad married? Have u gotten N education? If u were late 20”s to 30’s id say it may b time to pull back from dad but not until you and bf are serious about a future and come up with a plan on how to move forward.

Mi

Milissa • Nov 20, 2017
to

As

Ashley • Nov 18, 2017
Have talked about a future together but he's known from day 1 I have to help my dad. Hes 24 Im 21. Not engaged or anything yet.