How do you stop being so insecure??

Question

I seriously have always been insecure my entire life. I got bullied all throughout high school and that is entirely what it stems from. I was always pretty and I was targeted for that reason. But now I️ am 22, and my self confidence is so low. Any tips on how to not be so insecure ?

Answer

you need to find people that dont feed it and ruthlessly cut out anyone that does.  insecurity comes from fear which has its origins in your past experiences with others. i always thought like this too. like there was a sign on my forehead that just said "easy target". often bullies do pick up on submissive body language to choose a target but the problem is still them, not you. when i left high school things started to get better because i was able to have more choice about who i was around and wasnt crammed in a yard or classroom with a bunch of immature idiots... i distanced myself from certain family members as well and made some new friends and stayed very far away from the popular socialite crowd who tend to be very judgemental about petty things. when you have a good social circle thats not full of people who only  tear you down, you can start to heal and like yourself. changing your mindset can help too. when someone says shit about me i see it as more a problem with them than me. i also go by how many people are criticising me about this thing. if theres 10 people saying im a great generous person and just one accusing me of being a selfish bitch. well, i can assume that the 10 are a better indication of how i really am and this one bitch just has issues. if the majority think something bad i see it constructive like ok maybe theres something i need to change here. but not like omg i am a horrible person and fail at life. but ultimately, to change your thoughts they need some reinforcement from outside too. there are people who say its 100% about your mindset and maybe for rich, free, privileged people it is. you can believe with all your heart that gravity doesnt exist but it doesnt stop you falling to earth when you step out a window. just like you can try to see the best in things but when shit doesnt stop coming it wears you down and you start questioning if maybe there is something wrong with you or some reason for your unluckiness. cut out the toxic people and make a better environment for yourself. good luck.

How do you stop being so insecure??

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