I have had my Jaydess, 3-year, low-hormone IUD since September 15th of this year. Last Tuesday, I randomly got suicidal thoughts. I picked up a bottle of old medications and googled side-effects of overdosing and some of them were sudden death, seizures, vomiting, fainting, etc. This didn’t really phase me, much, as I kind of began to brush it off. I didn’t have any reason to do this—I just randomly wanted to. It came out of the blue.

I didn’t take them, but the next day, I went to school and told this little old lady that I always speak to (I’m at an alternative school with like, 10 other people so it’s very small, but I guess you could say she’s like the principal or office-worker?). I never cry in front of teachers, therapists, counsellors, friends, and I’m even reluctant to cry in front of my close friends and even my family, like my mother or father, yet I began sobbing in front of her as she spoke to me, because I was so overwhelmed and terrified by my thoughts of committing suicide and being stressed over school (I’m in grade 12 and am struggling to graduate or find the motivation to do what needs to be done to do so, this year). She got really concerned and called my counsellor that I see every 2 weeks and told her to come see me asap (she came the next morning). She was worried for me and didn’t want me to be alone and didn’t want me to go home without being assessed or talking to someone other than her (a professional), so she brought in a duty worker that assessed me before I left school for home. I told her I was literally too lazy to even think of a plan to kill myself, but I had pills, so I guessed that would be my attempt.

I’ve been a little depressed after all of this, and I spoke to my aunt and she thinks that because I’m a person who has experienced and does occasionally experience depression, the added hormones from my IUD could be worsening the depression and they can be known to cause these thoughts and symptoms. I originally wanted the copper IUD, but was told that it would make cramps awful, but I am vegan and I find that following a plant-based diet helped rid of my menstrual cramps completely, so I’ll probably be fine. I also didn’t want hormones. I’m wondering if I should get this one out and invest in the copper IUD. I just dread the painful procedure because it was awful. 🙄

So, I don’t know what to do, really. I’m wondering if I should get Jaydess out and replace it with a copper IUD, or if I should just wait it out and let things run their course. That could be risky, though. I think if it’s the hormones in birth control that are doing this and they are affecting me this much, I should switch.

What do you guys think?