just here venting..... I'm so stupid, in 2016 I linked up with an guy I met back in 2010. we would keep in contact throughout the years. But he was living his life in N.Y. and I was living in Maryland. It was on of those love at first sight type things.He had found my page on Facebook, I was so excited to have heard from him because the last time I had talk to him was in 2013 after I had just gave birth to my daughter. I just knew it had to be God sent him back in my life. Not to long after us linking up we decided to become a couple and I moved to N.Y. with him with my daughter. Shortly after things started going left because he was battling a alcohol problem. He relapsed 5months after me moving in with him. I started seeing a different side to him. He started disrespecting me, he would be texting flirting other women. Drinking and mentally abusing me. I ended up getting pregnant by him(smart I know) I went back home to have our son and had decided I was done with the man because I couldn't take his alcohol abuse and mental abuse. When I went home I let the creep get in my head And believed he was a changed man and I knew if he had stopped drinking everything would be okay. STUPID. Well I've been back for three months and nothing's has changed. I'm so mad at myself for bringing my kids in this. I really thought that I was doing something for them to have a family. But it's no peace and I am going crazy. This man is still getting pissy drunk, flirting with other women. never wanting to take me or the kids out as a family, but rather sit in the house and drink And pass out. Leaves the house a mess and expects me to clean up behind him. I'm getting everything l deserve for coming back because I could have stayed home with my family and got back on my two feet for me and my kids. I am making a plan to leave I just feel so unstable and this isn't healthy for my kids. I AM SO STUPID. I guess god said, okay you want to go back to him....now you really going to see. This has tested my patience in a major way.I dont reget it because my babyboy is a blessing, I just regret coming back. I have to get out of here and fast !! I Learned my lesson and had enough of it.