Baby Shower Etiquette?

Soooo two close family members offered to throw me a shower. I accepted happily & when we first discussed it, we talked about a co-ed shower (like an afternoon BBQ). I even mentioned it to a few people we were hoping to invite...

But now, one of the hostesses is saying she'd rather do ladies-only. I don't want to be rude about it since she is very kindly hosting, but it's really important to me that my husband be included. He was, after all, 50% responsible for creation of the baby & will of course be 50% responsible for its care. I want him to be equally a part of celebrating him/her. Advice on how I can approach this tactfully?