Okay so it is FINALLY time for me to write my own birth story 😍 reading these got me through not only the last month of pregnancy especially but really the whole thing 🤷🏻‍♀️ I love to know “oooooh that could happen to me!” And picture myself in someone else’s scenario! And I’m no writer (and I’ve been up for like 2 days straight lol) but here goes!

So I was due Saturday December 9th, and of course nothing! Then Monday morning around 3:30am I was woken up by some pretty strong contractions. I bounced around, changed positions, used a heating pad, walked around; nothing helped ease the pain of them BUT they had no consistency at all. 5 minutes apart, 8 minutes apart, 9, 15, 4, 11, 21! I mean they were all over the place so I was like eh okay my body may just be getting ready. About 5am I said SCREW THAT I had read enough stories to think “hmm well so and so didn’t have steady ones either but they were in labor!” So I headed into L&D; like the crazy FTM that I am, just to be watched for 2 hours and sent home because i was still stuck at 2cm 70% effaced like I had been before. The only difference from LAST Monday was me going from a tight 1cm to a 2! That’s all! So discouraging especially with how painful each contraction really was. I mean not enough to stop me in my tracks but definitely strong enough for me to say okay this isn’t right, these feel very real!

Anyways, they discharged me at like 7:30am!

Got me a Chick-fil-A biscuit (out of habit almost because I noticed i wasn’t very hungry like I ALWAYS AM! I mean I literally have to eat 24/7 to keep from being sick. But had no appetite this day 🤷🏻‍♀️) got my biscuit and went back to the house. Luckily for me I already had my regular appointment set for 10am so I went home and complained through more contractions and head to my appt. I told my doc what happened that morning and she said welp it could be early labor. Let’s give you a membrane sweep! It was my first one and I was very hopeful It would move things along especially with how many contractions i was continuously having and how they felt! They just weren’t consistent is all. Still ranging from 5 minutes between to 25 minutes between. The sweep didn’t hurt like I thought it would from hearing other people’s stories, it was like a regular uncomfortable cervix check that just lasted longer! I Got home around 11 and at around 1pm I lost What was CLEARLYYYYYYY my mucus plug and had my bloody show. YALL I was so excited but still these contractions only got worse. Needless to say by 7pm, contractions still being irregular, I said EFF THIS and head back up to L&D; with my SO this time. And this time I threw the car seat in the car with bags just in case.

And good thing I did! I get here get all hooked up and checked, now I’m at a TIGHT 3, they still almost called it a 2. They were iffy about if they wanted to keep me or not because they could see how strong and real these contractions were but not 5 minutes apart. Thank sweet baby Jesus for the Dr on call that decided to keep me I wanted to kiss him! I was so ready and so not ready to go home! I 10000% MOST DEFINITELY wanted an epidural as soon as possible! So I get checked in, call my mom, start laboring around the room breathing and moaning through contractions, made it to a 4-5, and was ready for some relief. No pitocin or anything was needed btw, things were progressing on their own so I was most definitely in labor all morning!

Ok Small back story - I have a blood condition that causes my white blood cell count to be VERY high, indicating infection, but NO infection. I’ve had it since I was a child and had my spleen removed because of it. So on paper if I have blood work done it looks like I have a terrible infection somewhere in my body lol -

Okay back to laboring! My nurse comes in and says “I have bad news, the anesthesiologist all agree you cannot have an epidural because of this unknown infection you have”

Uhhhhhhh What? So of course I thought she was kidding just trying to lighten the mood in my room because I was NOT happy with those pains lol YALL SHE WAS NOT JOKING! I fought my case yelling to call my hematologist and doctors and pretty much no one believed me that this is my normal and didn’t want to chance it. I was devastated to say the least. I have had ZERO plans of a natural birth, I mean NONE. I was so pro epidural you have no idea lol so after crying and yelling about it for hours i accepted defeat and demanded any other drugs they had 😂🤦🏻‍♀️ I got stadol (ignore my spelling please) and Demerol both into my IV at some point during this all. They both made me feel loopy and good between contractions to where I could rest in between, but definitely took zero edge off the actual contractions themselves.

So I’m walking around the room, on my ball, butt naked in the bathroom, and MOANING AND YELLING through every single contraction. I never wanted to be that pregnant lady that sounded like a cow but lawddddd I did not care at ALL come time for this! No epidural?! Sorry still not over it lol

Okay so I’m finally at 8-9cm, not able to get out of bed because they wouldn’t let me, I kept thinking I had to poop during every contraction and everyone was yelling that i wasn’t about to poop it was just baby’s head 😂🤷🏻‍♀️ I was very persistent on wanting to get onto that toilet! But I stayed in bed, and started practice pushing but real pushing at the same time i guess ?

It’s 3:25am now by the way. So technically now it’s Tuesday morning (i arrived at 8pm Monday night) Oh my GOD. I was in so much pain. I mean, I literally felt his body being pushed down with every push. It was so liberating and so tiring I can’t even describe it. Doctor comes in and gets suited up and kept telling me how amazing my pushing was (which I know they say to everyone but it definitely made me feel good regardless lol) and y’all seriously, I pushed and pushed and pushed through every contraction and I really felt like I knew what I was doing 🤷🏻‍♀️ they are really not lying when they say your body takes over and does what it is MADE to do. I was amazed. ME, someone who was SO PRO EPIDURAL, was pushing a baby out without one. Never in my life have a felt a pain like his head coming out, but right after it was, with one more gentle push, his little body slid out and was placed on top of me. My god. The feeling of relief you get RIGHT AFTER that pain of pushing is indescribable. It literally goes from your vagina feeling like it’s on ACTUAL FIRE to feeling all that fluid come out (sorry so gross) but it’s like ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh lol finally! and of course my first words when they put this precious little baby on me was “oh my god he isn’t even ugly!!!!!!!!!” 😂😂😂😂 im a mess!

I was so lucky not to tear, not to be cut, the doctor actually checked me out (after pushing out my placenta with just one more gentle push also) and said there wasn’t a SINGLE SCRATCH in there! I was amazed! The only thing I felt was discomfort in my butthole which I’m still feeling today 24 hours after birth. My SO said it stretched pretty wide lmao he was low the nurse said whatever that means!

But anyway I’m rambling now.

My sweet first baby, a baby boy, Roman Anthony was born at 3:57 am, after only 30 minutes of pushing, 8 hours of labor in the hospital, 24 hours of labor total from the first contraction, and with no damn epidural.

He is the most beautiful, calm, sweet, yummy smelling baby in the world 😍 don’t we all think that about our babes?!

He had some trouble feeding, latching, and even had trouble feeding from the bottle, but now 25 hours after birth he’s doing great. We’re still here in the hospital they just finally took him to have a bath since his sugars are going up, and he just breastfed for 30 minutes (huge success for me right now!) and ugh I’m just so in love I could go on for days so I’ll just stop here but let me say:

OUR BODIES ARE AMAZING! I feel like I didn’t even just give birth! Other than all this disgusting bleeding and butthole pain, I feel so liberated. Strong. Empowered. Epidural or no epidural we are creating LIFE INSIDE OF US ? Like hello, this is amazing! This little human just fell out of me and he already has me wrapped around every single finger. No matter how your labor goes (screw your birth plan because heller doesn’t even matter lol) we are amazing and we should be so proud that we can do something like bring life into this world! Thank you all for sharing your stories and I hope mine wasn’t too long and annoying lol I’m just typing what comes into my head 🤷🏻‍♀️ I can’t wait to still keep up with all my December mommies and the postpartum group. Y’all have all helped me more than you know from day one!

Here’s some pics of my little lover boy 😍

He is 50% Black (dad) and 25% Puerto Rican And 25% Italian (me)

***UPDATE AGAIN***

His jaundice levels were so high y’all, we got moved to a different hospital and he has been in the nicu for 2 days! He’s doing triple phototherapy and has an iv for fluids in his scalp and foot to make him pee more! He’s been on formula only :( I’ve been so sad I have been too down to bother with pumping and they’ve let me latch him onto me a few times before his feedings! Has anyone else’s baby ever had very high bilirubin levels ? How long did they stay in the hospital? I want him home so bad 😩

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