am i weird

idk whats wrong with me im 17 but i literally cant ever keep a relationship going idk i feel like i lose interest so fast & i just become pessimistic. literally things never go past the talking phase unless its a hookup kinda thing at a party or something ( still a virgin tho) also im pretty insecure but i think most people perceive me as being a confident baddie type. i really want a relationship w this guy im talking to but i feel like id ruin it. ugh this whole post is kinda a mess, can anyone relate or give some advice😔