Holiday Anxiety.

ok y'all, I'm not sure where to post this at but here's a little insight...

my family has always done me wrong and burned me. My relationships with them coast by for some time before they do something absolutely toxic and hurtful. I haven't seen most of them for about 2 years or so.

Well I'm coming down for the holidays and my anxiety is through the roof!!!! I can feel my heart beating out of my chest as the days get closer to make the drive out of town!!!

I want to avoid it all completely. I want to spend time with my grandma and grandpa because they'll be passing soon but the thought of sitting in everyone's face makes me so nervous. I hate this. I hate my family. They aren't fond of me either. I just don't want to come down and relive all of my child hood disappointments.

I just wanted to vent really. 😕😕