Our Journey πŸ’”


Our story ❣️

I am married to a man who loves me 100% unconditionally. πŸ’™πŸ’œHe makes me feel wonderful about myself always and is constantly giving me the love and attention I need. I would like to think he feels the same about my love towards him. On April 9th 2016 we got married and that was THE best day of my life to date. πŸ₯‚πŸ’’πŸ‘°πŸΌπŸ€΅πŸ»I have never ever been happier than that day. Our love is so strong we quickly began realizing we would want to share that love of ours with a child of our own.πŸ’

Tyler is very loving and children have always been drawn to him. And I know he will be the best father someday. August 2016 we started our journey in trying to conceive. The first few months were exciting and like a new adventure... hearing things like... "oh we are such a fertile family", "practice makes perfect πŸ˜‰", and "your young it will only be a matter of time!". We truly believed these things from our family and friends (who meant nothing but the best for us).

A few months passed and no luck! πŸ’” Then hearing things like "just don't think

About it", "it will happen when it happens", "just RELAX!", "go on a vacation they say that's when it happens"... became extremely annoying πŸ™„ and hurtful... although they were not meant to be that way. We began to get worried and just when we thought our luck was out after 11 month on this roller coaster on July 21st 2017 we saw those ever so longed for two pink lines! 😍🀰It was happening! We made a Drs appointment and were beaming with happiness. It was really OUR time! πŸ‘ͺ

The Dr confirmed our home test and reassured me that some of the spotting I was having was 100% normal. We shared the news with our families. πŸ‘ΆπŸ»I have only dreamed of those reactions! Cheering, crying, pure joy and happiness for us and our new little bundle of joy! We knew this was right. Everything felt right with the world and like nothing could get us down! I was already 6 weeks! Tyler and I felt like we were going to be parents, our love for each other grew stronger it seemed overnight! Little did we know that high would be short lived. πŸ˜”

On July 26th only 5 days after the NEW best day of our lives I saw a little brown spot... I was extremely concerned and knew something wasn't right. Everyone tried to keep me calm. Tyler and my family did all they could to calm me and make me feel like everything was going to be alright ... that was all they could do right!? That night quickly undoubtedly became the WORST night of our lives. πŸ’”πŸ–€As the pain grew and things happened Tyler and I never ever wanted to see, we knew the fait of our little bean that we only got to love for such a short time, was grim. That night was something we will never ever forget... Iv never been so sad but felt so loved by my husband... it was so indescribable. We pleaded together out loud with the Lord. But things just got worse and worse. 😭

As our family rushed to our aid and we're there with us every step of the way our nightmares became a reality. At 7 weeks on July 27th 2017 we lost our baby. πŸ‘ΌπŸΌYes we are part of the 1/3, yes this happens "a lot".... trust me when I say... when it's your baby... Those things mean jack shit.... nothing. My heart hurt so bad, Tyler's heart hurt just as bad.. friends and family helped us through the next weeks and we picked ourselves back up. We had to. There is nothing else you can do at that point. ☹️

We kicked it into high gear after this. Demanding help from our dr and eventually onto a fertility specialist. Appointments, blood draws, stomach pricks, procedures, butt shots, the fun is never ending... but hopefully it will all be worth it! πŸ₯πŸ’ŠπŸ’‰πŸ”¬πŸ“‹

Now here we are 5 months later and we are in the same spot we were in 16 months ago... longing for a baby, but this time we have an angel πŸ‘ΌπŸ»watching over us. We have two options... give up... or pick our asses up off off the shower floor and move on.

No matter how many low points, ultrasounds, shots all over my body, rude condescending nurses, uncomfortable moments we have.... one day it will all be worth it. One day I will be able to call My Handsome Perfect Husband a daddy and myself and mommy πŸ‘¨β€πŸ‘©β€πŸ‘§


WE WILL DO THIS.... mark my words.πŸ’š

When the NEXT best day of our lives comes around... we will stand and say.... we prayed and fought like hell for this moment and damn it feels good!!!! πŸ’πŸΌβ£οΈ

So I guess the moral of this is... you aren't alone. This journey, unfortunately is true for many of us. Even though it's hard to share... just know, your not alone. πŸ˜­πŸ’”