I just need to put this out here so maybe I will feel a bit better because I can't stop tearing up about it (pregnancy hormones, I'm sure). It's long - sorry...My grandpa is 87 and has always jabbed at us and also grumbles a lot. That's just who he is...he also recently fell and so isn't doing well - I'm actually pretty scared this was his final Christmas (seriously with the tears right now?)...anyway we did the first ever secret Santa gift exchange, and I was in charge. I wasn't able to participate really so I got everyone handmade mugs that were personalized. Anyway I am standing near the tree, where my grandpa is, and announce that. I move to pass them out and he says, "well what the hell are you passing out" and I snorted back "well just be quiet and you'll find out" and then jabs my butt with his two fingers to be funny...well this would be a totally normal exchange except for me being pregnant and up doing too much (I'm not supposed to bend, pick things up, or walk a lot due to hip issues and prior bleeding a few weeks ago and seriously the last two days I've done WAY too much..I also had been outside just before this trying to cool off because I was overheating) so I looked at him and said twice (second time trying not to burst into tears because pain was shooting through me) "oh don't do that, please don't do that!" I quickly handed out the mugs after almost falling over because of the pain and left the room to grab some Tylenol and started to hyperventilate in the kitchen where my dad came in to see what was wrong. Apparently not a lot of people saw what had happened just that I had left crying. Most thought he just said something mean as a joke (again not unusual for my grandpa) I told him and he made me go sit down on the couch and not get up the rest of the evening. I know my grandpa didn't mean to hurt me and I tried to go on the rest of the evening like nothing happened talking to him about his gifts and what not...but now I'm 100% embarrassed that I cried in front of everyone and also sad because what if this was his last Christmas (did i just ruin it)? I like can't stop tearing up. My husband got mad at me for "overreacting" and letting my grandpa have such a strong emotional response over me...but I told him it wasn't emotional it was physical and he said "whatever." Like I was almost passing out from the heat earlier and bent over in pain trying to get comfortable earlier and it's like that didn't even phase him. I also have been the main person running after our 18 month old the past two days because he wasn't feeling well yesterday and this morning (Christmas morning). So now I just feel worthless and horrible...I hate how my body hurts due to nerve damage, I hate my pregnancy hormones, and I hate that I cried like that... I'm at my parents house the next few days- I think I might need to make a trip to my grandparents to try to make up for it...I don't know what to do :(