Picture it. Maryland. Freezing cold. 24 weeks pregnant. First time my husband been home for xmas since 2013 (deployed). Anyway I wanted things to be “perfect” or close enough but what I got sucked big time. It started at my families house which was wonderful because my family has no drama 🙌🏼.

We head over to his mothers house.

I was trying to just smile while she put her hands all over my baby belly 🤦🏼‍♀️. I wanted to scream “get the fuck away!” But I just smiled and laughed awkwardly 😅.

Side note: my husband parents aren’t together anymore. Also his brother has a baby momma who’s from a family of women that get pregnant by rich men on purpose.

So back to the story. My dear brother in law missed xmas 4 years in a row. He said this year he was coming. Okay sure. We all waited on him but nothing. He even bought us cupcakes for xmas so this time we believed he would show. Next thing I know his mother gets a phone call from him and he’s screaming at her. Mind you he’s 33 years old and lives 35 mins away.

He said “I’m not coming because I want to watch the basketball game and sleep!”

Which sets his mother off on us because she wants to protect him. So my mother in law starts yelling at US!!! Wtf. She said “he doesn’t want to be with us because you guys conspired with the enemy!” 🤚🏼 so my sister in law goes off on her saying his son isn’t the enemy and if he and I quote “wrapped his fucking dick up he wouldn’t be in this situation!” I made a joke that made people laugh and the mood changed. Thank god!!

Then she came for me. She wanted blood.

Back track to a few days ago. We are looking to buy a house and the realtor we picked is a middle aged heavy set guy. My mother in law had the nerve to make fun of him for being “fat”. So I clapped back. I said “not all of us can afford a tummy tuck!”

Anyway. Apparently she heard me say this. “Not all of us can spend 10k on a tummy tuck to remove all of their gross fat!” So during dinner she started tell me how I said that and how rude I am blah blah blah. 🤦🏼‍♀️👎🏼 so we left. 👋🏼 I’m pregnant and don’t want to deal with crappy drama.

Also she’s a rotten drunk and let’s say she had a few drinks.

Now she’s trying to get us to come with her to my brother in laws today for a second xmas. Nope. Fuck that.