I’m an awful mother

My first thought when first seeing my son after giving birth to him was, “he’s ugly and I don’t want him”. I was in active labor and at the hospital for almost 48 hours. They took him to get cleaned up and I fell asleep. When they brought him in again I immediately fell in love and he’s been my whole world ever since. Am I a horrible mom for that first thought? I haven’t told anyone about that because I’m so ashamed to have felt that way if only for a second.