I never recovered.

In 2017, I married my husband. But I have a lot of issues stemming from an abusive relationship I was in in 2014-2015. My ex raped me, and then emotionally abused me for over a year. In 2015, I tried to get away by attempting suicide. It landed me in a mental hospital for almost 3 weeks, and has left me scarred. My husband is so patient with me and so understanding, but I feel like I can’t be intimate with him. And now we’re expecting our first child, but I still get those guilt feelings that I shouldn’t be allowed to be happy. It’s tearing me apart. What can I do to keep these feelings at bay?