So basically I am 27 years old and pregnant with my 2nd child. I have an 8 year old daughter that I had when I was 19. My daughters father was absent and I ended up finding out he had another girl pregnant at the same time as me. I left him and he went on to have a bunch more kids with a bunch of other women.

In the meantime I reconnected with an old school mate and we stayed together up until now. He’s the only father my daughter knows and he’s great with her so no complaints there. Now here is the issue. Last year I found out he was cheating with multiple people including a few of his exes. I kicked him out of the apartment we shared and I ultimately went crazy at the thought of my relationship ending and another girl getting MY GUY. (Crazy I know)

We ended up getting back together not too long after and decided that we wanted to try to have a baby and move fwd. I stopped my birth control and that was the plan. Looking back I realize I still didn’t trust him but I wanted things to work so

I knew if I forgave him, I had to work on trusting him again. So to make a long story short i found out he was still cheating and threw him out yet again. We broke up and that was that. I got pregnant a month later. We aren’t together and we both just feel as if the damage is done with the relationship.

Now here is where I’m torn. He’s told me that he’s started talking to other people which makes me feel some kind of way being pregnant by him. To be honest I don’t want us to get back together any time soon but I also don’t think now is the time to pursue other relationships (although he was doing that while we were together anyway) alas I feel some kind of way. On one hand we knew what we were doing and I feel like I’m much to old to be having an abortion when this could have been prevented had I just been honest with myself about who he was and what he was about. It just seems careless to my body to abort when I’ve wanted another baby for so long and I’m perfectly capable. But on another hand I don’t feel like I want to have a child with somebody I’m not in a relationship with. I did that with my first daughter and I feel like I’m making the same mistake twice (not that my daughter was a mistake) I’m in a great career and essentially life is good for me as a single woman. I could easily provide a wonderful and comfortable life for my daughter and I.

I feel like having a second child would diminish my stock in the dating world. (Don’t shoot; I’m just being honest) Ultimately I want a husband and a family however I’m terrified to be single and pregnant again. All I can envision is myself being lonely and pregnant and him having the time of his life with someone else. I’m not over him, and I don’t want to open myself up for any more pain/drama. An abortion would be the easy way out but I just don’t see myself being able to do that when I intentionally got pregnant (unprotected sex is intentionally getting pregnant in my book). I know he’s a good dad and we co parent my daughter well since we haven’t been together But I’m just so torn on what to do. My feelings change every day. I feel embarrassed of this situation when I’ve done nothing wrong. What would you do in my situation? Keep the baby and coparent? Or abort and be done with him for Good.