Tomorrow my LO is going to be a week old.

From the minute he was born, both my family and the hospital berated me for not being able to breastfeed from the get go. I cried every minute I could because I was so stressed and felt so defeated and worthless to my LO.

Finally home and my milk comes in. I decide pumping is the next best thing for my LO.

My body once again says otherwise. I can’t even go 30 min between pumps without my breasts getting huge and hard and so painful. I’ve done everything and it keeps happening 😥😣 it’s getting to the point where my back is now hurting because of how big and heavy they get.

Between a crying baby, barely any sleep, baby blues, a painful stitched up vagina, and giant painful breasts.. I am just so beat up 🤕😞

I don’t feel like doing this anymore. I’d rather give my LO formula than have to go through this hell for god knows how many months.

Am I a monster for feeling this way?

And if anyone has gone through a similar experience, I would really appreciate some friendly, positive advice. Thank you ♥️