Hey ladies,

my boyfriend has this friend that, from time to time will spend him perverted porn videos and photos on WhatsApp. I was aware that his friend does this and I politely asked him to tell his friend to cut this shit out, because I was personally hurt with the whole idea and it made me very uncomfortable. So he hadn't sent him any more things like that for a while (or maybe I never saw them before he got to delete them). But today, I was on his phone and I went to his phone gallery just because it's a habit. I can't even remember if I was looking for something specific, or if is as just browsing. But then I saw it. And I was a shocked.

On my baby's phone gallery was a very busty woman with her tits out, and the photo was saying something like "Happy weekend", but where the two e's were supposed to be, were where her boobs are. Now, I know he watches porn when I'm not there and I know he looks at stuff like that. But I am a very sensitive person, I've never had the biggest self esteem. So I questioned him about the picture and he said his friend sent it to him. And when I was about to delete it and tell his friend off, he instantly grabbed his phone away and said not to delete it.

A few more things...

Lately my anxiety and depression has flared up again, and my self esteem is so low. And my extreme sensitivity doesn't help it. I broke down in tears when he told me that if I don't wanna find things like that on his phone, that I shouldn't be on his phone looking for them. My heart just hurts so much everytime I see him doing things like that. And like I said, I know he watches porn and stuff I just wish he'd keep it out of my view. Out of sight, out of mind. And when his friend used to send them, I'm guessing he would watch them but he'd always delete them. And when confronted about why he didn't delete this one, he said "why bother, it's a nice thing to wake up to in the morning" and he laughed. Even just writing that brings tears to my eyes, I don't know why.

Any advice? How can I boost my self esteem? And just as important, am I wrong to be hurt over this? Also he claims that if I had random dick pics off the internet on my phone that he'd be totally cool with it, but he's probably only saying that because he's in deep boiling water for his actions.