I'm scared

so last month I was like 100% sure I was pregnant had every symptom underneath the roof and it turned out negative and it broke me and my wife's heart. so yeah lesbian mommies. now that we're over that, I really haven't been having a whole bunch of symptoms this is the second month I've been trying and I am absolutely scared of taking a pregnancy test because I know that if it comes out negative it's going to break my heart and I don't know if I can take that again. So for those out there that's been trying a long time I honestly feel so bad about that because I know how bad it hurts. I don't want to have to keep trying me and my wife would be fine with just one kid but it's like the world has been working against us. I hope everybody who have been trying to get pregnant gets that positive and I will be praying for you guys. please pray for us.