"who was in your belly?" I sadly respond "no one" πŸ˜”


My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year now. We live together and he has fully custody of his 4 year old daughter. Last June I found out I was pregnant. But I had a miscarriage in July. In June, we also found out that his daughter's mom was pregnant just days after me. We never told his daughter I was pregnant because I wanted to wait until I was out of the red zone for miscarriage. I love his daughter like she was my own. We have the best bond imaginable. Well last night she hugs me and pats my stomach then goes "hi baby sissy!". It just broke my heart because I know she only did that because that's what she does with her mom. But I had to just play it off. She's 4. what can you really expect. But tonight we're driving home and she asks me "who was in your belly?". I got really quiet but I had to just say "no one". Then she asks "why?". I just get really quiet and my boyfriend goes "God just had a different plan baby". Like, what am I suppose to say to that? I want more than anything to have another chance at giving her a sibling as well. My SO and I just recently started to TTC a couple months ago. But her saying that yesterday and today but got to my heart. If it were up to my I'd still be pregnant giving her the things she's saying now. But I'm not and there's nothing I can do about what has already been done. I just hope and pray one day soon we'll get our rainbow baby πŸŒˆπŸ˜”