This is gonna be a bit long, but I think reality is finally kicking in for me. I couldn't believe that all this time, I was growing my little bean inside me. My husband & I tried for 3 years. We had slowed down on trying (we used to have sex 3-4, sometimes 5 times a week in efforts to make a baby.) I was preparing to start working 2 jobs & we had gone for a visit to NC the beginning of September (I'm assuming that between the long weekend we spent there & our first week & a half being home is when we conceived, going back by dates on when we found out.) I was working both jobs, so we didn't do much of anything & I was so tired. I had missed my period in August (my periods were always irregular since I had my first son so I didn't think much of it, but they had gotten on track a bit more) so I took a few tests towards the end of August & in the beginning of September. They were negative. My sister in law had found out she was pregnant also towards the end of July, beginning of August (which I was so happy for her because her & her husband had been trying too, but I was also really sad because we'd been trying so hard, so I kept taking tests during that time because I felt different.) Nothing really told me "take a test" after we came back & I started working both jobs. I just thought it was because I was working 2 jobs, I was tired, plus the weather changing was making me feel crappy. I was telling my co workers about how I felt & they asked me too if I was pregnant, but I said no because I genuinely thought there was no way. I normally avoid doctors appointments if I can because I can normally get over whatever it is by myself. I was complaining about the way I felt & my mom told me to make an appointment, so finally I did. I went in on November 14th. The doctor I had was such an ass, I really didn't like him. I told him my symptoms, (I was nauseous, dizzy, didn't want to eat, felt like I could pass out, etc) how I was feeling & he checked my ears & said I had fluid in my them which would cause the nausea & dizziness. He sent me to get some labs done & he gave me a prescription for Meclizine to help with the dizziness. So I went home, figuring it was just the fluid in my ears. AT THIS POINT, I STILL didn't feel I should take a test. I was tired of my body letting me down & not giving me the baby we've been so desperately trying to have. I was off work that day so when I woke up, I had a missed call from the doctors. Okay, so I knew my blood test came back to check for anything else that could be wrong. I give her my name, birthday & why I'm calling. She says "everything looks normal, but your pregnancy test came back positive." 😱😮 I was in shock. My jaw hit the ground (or so it felt like.) My mom heard "positive" & started crying instantly after seeing my face, my husband was in the kitchen freaking out. I asked her "I'm sorry, what?" she repeated it & I said "oh wow, okay, thank you!" I was still in such shock, I didn't know what to say or think. I got off the phone & I hugged my husband & told him we were having a frickin baby! I went to the store & bought pregnancy tests because I couldn't believe it & I also went by my doctor to get the paper that says it. Still in utter disbelief, I held onto that pee stick & I couldn't stop looking at it for days. When I say days, I mean until the lines faded 💁 I called around to the hospitals near me. I had a hard time getting through to all of them. One said they would call me back, the other I could never get through on. I left my name, phone number & the reason I was calling for both of them. I didn't hear anything back from either of them that day. I called the next day & finally after calling each hospital 6 times each, getting hung up on, not called back & just being irritated about it all, I got a call. It was from the main hospital I actually wanted, where I delivered my first son. The guy set me an appointment for December 1st. I go for my appointment & the lady was super nice. I'm telling her about my periods, why I was there etc, & she stops what she's doing & looks at me & says "you're pregnant?" I said yes & she proceeds to tell me that the guy who made the appointment scheduled it for "desiring pregnancy" not that I was actually pregnant. I was pissed because I had to set another appointment. So luckily it was only a few days longer. I went back on December 4th for the initial appointment & to have my first ultrasound. I found out I was 10 weeks & 4 days along. When I seen the little bean in there I cried. I was still in shock honestly, I thought that this can't be real, but sure enough it was. The heartbeat was 154 & it was a normal early pregnancy. Seeing the little bean move around in there was so amazing. (I was 21 weeks & 3 days the first time I was pregnant when I had my first & only ultrasound with my son.) So throughout the weeks we went to appointments & everything. None of this still felt completely real. I was 16 when I found out I was pregnant & at that age, I didn't want my son (I was young, please don't judge. After hearing his heartbeat, I was hooked. Obviously, I had him & he's almost 7 now) So being 23 & about to have another baby after almost 7 years of nothing & 3 years of constantly trying, it was still shocking for me. On December 18th, I went for another ultrasound to check for any deformities (trisomy 21/18/13). Our little bean didn't want go cooperate too well because the tech had to lay me down further & push into my stomach a bit. (I also had extra weight from my first pregnancy so it made it a little harder.) Everything came back & looked normal on the scans which was a relief. The heartbeat was still 154. I wasn't due to be seen until January 8th again. When I went to the appointment, the OB & I talked & then she listened to the heartbeat. When she put the Doppler on, she had a hard time finding the heartbeat. I tried not to worry or cry right away, thinking the baby was just not wanting to work with us. She kept trying & trying, finally after 5 minutes (which seemed like 30) she moved down lower & to the left & she finally got it. I started crying instantly. She said she didn't mean to scare me & she was sorry. She said sometimes with "extra fluff" as she called it, it's hard to find & she said the baby was probably just moving around too. The heartbeat was in the 150s, which was good. After that appointment, I have been so scared. I knew it was just the way the baby was laying or because of how small the bean is that she couldn't pick it up right away, but I've been so scared lol. On January 17, right before my 17 week mark, I felt the baby move for the first time. Of course you can't see it on the outside, but I felt it! I was so happy & relieved. I'd been so stressed out over the baby since the appointment, but when I felt little bean move, it made me so happy. It wasn't a flutter like I expected, it was a small, yet firm little move. It felt almost as if the baby was bigger (if that makes sense.) Yesterday (January 24th) I felt little bean move again! This time it was a flutter feeling. My husband wants to feel it so bad, but we both know that it won't be able to be felt on the outside until another week or two, maybe. Today, I was looking at our baby book, tomorrow is my 5 month mark, so I was just reading over some stuff & I just realized "holy crap. I'm almost halfway. 2 more weeks & I'll be halfway through this pregnancy." Which is what prompted me to write this. I've been in such disbelief over the fact that I'm pregnant, even though I talk about it all the time, I feel my belly getting harder & I've felt the baby move. I've been so scared that something would go wrong or I'd lose the baby (even though my first pregnancy was a healthy one & had no complications.) I think it's finally setting in that it won't be much longer & I'll have my second little angel in my arms in June. While I was writing this, the baby moved too, which made me just smile like crazy! I'm so glad I'm pregnant & now that it's finally hitting me, I want to enjoy it the best I can because I loved being pregnant the first time. I almost didn't want to stop being pregnant but I knew I had to, obviously lol. Little beans big brother is sort of excited, but I don't think he grasps that there will soon be a baby. He knows I'm pregnant, but he had a rough life (its a super long story involving his abusive father. To make it short, his father got full custody of him, abused him & hurt him in so many ways. I wasn't able to see him for 3 years. He has some stuff he has to work through) & he's scared that he may be replaced or pushed aside (which I have reassured him he wouldn't.) My sister is happy to be an aunt again. My mom is happy about being a Granny for a second time. My husband is ecstatic & so is his family. His mom will have 2 brand new grand babies roughly about the same time. (My sister in law & I are only 1 month, 3 weeks & 3 days apart due date wise.) I find out what I'm having on February 12th & I can't wait. I'm hoping for a girl, but obviously, I will love little bean regardless of what they are. 😍❤ Baby Foster due June 28, 2018.

10 weeks 4 days.

12 weeks 4 days.

17 weeks.

My husband, son & I. I was about 14-15 weeks pregnant.

Positive test