Help me...drowning in pain

I have no where to turn to. My hubby doesn't realize how hard it is to live with this empty feeling inside me anymore. I can't get outta bed or even finding a reason to live. I have been clinically depressed for years and I'm thinking of ending it all. I just don't have the strength to live on anymore. Not that I feel like anyone cares. I want to make sure that everything is taking care of so no one had to bury me. How can I live when I know that people pretend to care? I don't want to confide in anyone anymore. So much stress and presurre from my own heart that I have a hard time breathing. Why do I have to deal with this? Help me!