Its the hormones *longer*

So idk this always gets to me when I'm pregnant but it does. My husband and I have been married 3 years now, with 3 (almost 4 children). We didn't get to have the "traditional" wedding by any means due to circumstances at the time (my ex was trying to take me to court for custody of my oldest son who he had only seen a handful of times). It's funny how people continue to screw with you even when they aren't around.

We got married in a courthouse (all traditions were met, ie. wear something old, new, borrowed and blue) with close family present then went to a nice steak house for lunch where my mother-in-law had made us an incredible cake and my mom got me a small bouquet of my favorite flowers.. And honestly I wouldn't trade that day for anything but sometimes it sucks to have been planning your bigger wedding all to have to change plans because of someone else.

Now don't get me wrong my grandparents got married in a courthouse 56+ years ago and have been living and loving since so I'm not hating on that at all. But sometimes it sucks to never get to wear the wedding dress that your mother bought you, hear the vows your husband would have written, had your family walk you down the aisle, get to cherish the day ALL ABOUT YOU. I guess I see all the women getting married with their gorgeous dresses and beautiful weddings and all I want to do is cry, why didn't I get all I dreamed of.

I realize it's not the wedding people remember it's the love and marriage which I know my husband and I make a kick-ass team anyone who knows us will tell you that. But I would love to see him in a tuxedo waiting for me at the end of the aisle. I know we could always do a vow renewal with our kids and honestly I would love to it just sucks I never got what I had dreamed of all those years as a little girl.

Sorry this was so long but I just had to get it all out, I don't think being 4+ months pregnant helps anything either. Thanks for who ever is willing read this I appreciate your time. ♥️