Hi so I'm kinda new to this app and this is the first time I've posted anything but I have a bit of a problem...I'm in love with someone that makes me hate everything about myself.

I suppose I should explain..

My best friend, who I have known since the dawn of time, is a unique character. She is rude to everyone. No exceptions. Besides me. She's known to be an absolute bitch but I love her none the less, though I do hate her actions. Everyone knows that I'm the only person she tolerates. This doesn't mean she nice to me. She constantly degrades me for the person I am. But recently, no this has been going on for a while but I'm only now realizing what I'm feeling, I adore her so much. She makes me feel complete. But she also is constantly degrading me and making me feel worthless. I hate that I feel this way. Why should I like someone that makes me feel so bad. I'm sort of young and I guess these feeling could just be my idiotic mind running wild but I don't know what to do. She is my only friend and I would be lost without her but I know she is ruining me as a person. I suffer from exteme anxiety and depression so this situation does not help at all. I'm to scared to start up for myself though...I don't know what to do...

I apologise for ranting like this and if it's against the rules to post something like this I will gladly take it down.