I recently decided with my boyfriend that we weren’t going to have sex anymore. When I was at his house we were messing around and he asked me if i wanted to fuck and he was doing things so in the moment i was like yeah. Immediatley after i said like wait i dont think this is a good idea i dont want to break our rule and i kept saying i dont think this is a good idea but he did it anyways. I didn’t say no but i felt like i was gonna cry most of the time. I love him so so much though. After I was like hey I said that I didn’t think that was a good idea and he said well its not like I forced you or held you down. and he’s right i just felt so helpless? was this rape?