Trying to put it into words...

Christine • Rainbow baby boy born January 2017 🌈 after a missed miscarriage Dec`14, molar pregnancy Apr`15 and blighted ovum Feb'16
The way i can best describe what i feel is... hunger. I feel this insatiable hunger, the longing, the desire to have a little heart beating inside of me! I can't help myself. I'm scared to death of losing another pregnancy. I'm not sure how i could deal with it, so when people ask me if I want to try again, I have my doubts, I don't know what to say... Do i want to go through this? Do i want to try again? 
I'm starting to think i'll take the risk of another heartbreak for a chance to become a mother. It is so worth it. I have to. The weeks are passing by. It's been 8 weeks now. Before we know it, I'll be cleared to try again, in a few months hopefully. I will try again.