PLEASE HELP !!! MIL PROBLEM
I have been with my husband for more than 5 years now.
We are both 32.
Got married last year.
He is my soul mate and we love each other.
The problem is his mother. She is a very toxic person and everything I did since I met her to try to have a great relationship with her did not do anything.
We lived 3 years in China.
I would come home to see my parents every year but she would come to visit her son every year and we would come to see her every year too.
Every single time I have seen her she would say to me, "I really do not understand how your parents did not come to visit you once, like every where my son would go I would go to..." she told me this 30 times already but did not tell my parents when she met them.
when she met them, they told her how a wonderful son she has raised but she just said thank you.
She cries every single time something does not go her way.
My parents invited her to see a movie from their childhood dear to their heart with my husband and I, when leaving the movies and asked how she liked it, she just said "not at all"
When she came to visit us in our new city last year for a week, we spent all day everyday together, ate at all restaurants, organized multiple activities with her, and the Sunday, we just wanted to do a 1hour shopping to buy for our apartment and gave her to good address to visit with her new boyfriend who was there. 2 months ago, she started crying about this and said that we abandoned her last year.. I swear I did not know what she was talking about so I asked her and she said it was no surprise at all that me among all people does not remember.
Also, since 5 years that I know her she had 3 different boyfriends.
and I learnt that another one that she was living with with her kids was taking pictures of my husband's sister half naked and it took her a lot of time to get rid off him. but she still demands her children get invested in her every other relationships.
I do not know what to do anymore I am not used to this, my parents have been married 40 years and I only surround myself with positive and sane people.
she even ruined my wedding day taking all the attention to her self at the most important moment and yelling at my brother who is a sweetheart.
she often theatens to kill herself in front of her kids if something does not go her way.
we live in another country now but I really need help in what to do. we are TTC and my husband agrees that I don't have to be in real contact with her because she has become a real poison in my life as I w as so hoping to have a great relationship with my husband mom and she will be my kids grandma.
she insists she wants a lot of contact from us especially my husband and he agrees.
I do not know how to handle her anymore.
please help and sorry for the LONG message