Okay, on January 25th, I gave birth to my sweet baby girl, Layla Claire.

This week, Thursday to be exact, I will be 6 weeks postpartum and cleared for sexy time.

I know my boyfriend is ready to have sex and has been patiently waiting.

But here’s the thing...

I am completely and totally uncomfortable, disgusted, and appalled by my post pregnancy body.

I don’t like who I see in the mirror. At all.

I know he’s gonna be ready for sex.. and I am too. I’ve been wanting to have sex. But the reality of it is, I don’t want to because of my body. My love handles, my flab, the stretch marks.. the bruises on my belly from having to inject blood thinners due to complications after birth, my engorged boobs and round nipples from breastfeeding... I feel disgusting. All around. And you know if you feel like that, you don’t wanna have sex. I don’t even like him to look at me..

How do I approach this? I want to have sex until I look at myself in the mirror. I’m not anything like I used to be. I used to be tan, skinny (120 lbs), no stretch marks, I always kept my hair/nails done, always wore makeup..

And now I’m gross, and I hate myself.. I feel such disgust...

What do I say to my boyfriend? He’s been so patient. How can I explain to him that I can’t have sex right now because I’m filled with so much self hate? I feel like I’m not what he signed up for now. I’m not the cute, fun girl he once loved and knew. I’m now a helicopter mom who is far from cute.

Please help, ladies. I need some clarity. Some advice. I feel so lost inside of myself.

Lonely