the first two years of high school, I was very conservative. I didn’t talk to boys, didn’t kiss anyone, didn’t have fun. my best friend was the opposite, always had a boyfriend, always was with guys. so around christmas time sophomore year, this guy started talking to me. (let’s call him n) I babysat his little brother but he would be home when I was there so we talked and stuff. we were facetiming one night when my bff was over and we ended up sending nudes. (I know it’s bad but I made sure it was safe) so that was my first time like actually doing anything at all. we talked for a couple weeks, but ended it right after xmas. I had already agreed to babysit for his brother on new years so I was kind of dreading it. on new years, he had some friends over and I started talking to one of them. (let’s call him m) we got each others snapchats and started talking. ( wow i’m a hoe now I know) I also sent nudes to him (now I realize that was a mistake). we talked for a while but I started liking a guy at my school (let’s call him j) so I ended it with the other guy. without telling me, he had an ipad and would take pictures of my nudes on his phone so he could save them without screenshotting. fast forward to this weekend. i’m still talking to the guy from my school, but he was pissing me off and I was ignoring him all day. n’s mom asked me to babysit and I didn’t want to but I honestly needed the money so I said yes. it was st. patrick’s day so i knew they would be out pretty late. the kids went to bed at 8 and they wouldn’t be home until 2. i was downstairs on the couch with n, his other brother, and his friend (let’s call him b) I was told that b thought I was hot so we started hitting it off. we ended up making out but nothing else. he left, so it was just me, n, and his brother. we started talking about m, and m sent n one of my nudes that he had saved. i’ve never been more embarrassed in my life. I text m, furious, and tell him to delete everything. a few hours later, n brings me home because his parents are spending the night at a hotel. on the 10 minute ride home he starts asking me about m and of course brings up us talking. he literally asked for road head. he told me how good that picture was and how he was hoping to get some road head. I said no because he has a girl and was very uncomfortable the rest of the ride home. and now b is texting me constantly because he thinks I like him even though I really don’t and want to be with j. my life’s a mess damn.