I posted a while back how fantastic my life was how I had a terrible heroin and crack addiction and had been homeless. After being in and out of jail and almost dying I got help. In my recovery process I started a relationship with an old friend whom I've know for 11 years who is also in recover. He has roughly one year clean me a little less.

Time goes by we get engaged to be married, I end up pregnant but we're excited and start looking at houses.

I'm working full time busting my ass and he's taking extra shifts at work working a ton of house all the while I'm telling him how proud I am of him.

Everything is a dream come true and we're excited to start our lives together. Then money starts disappearing. First it was weird because he'd work these long hours and he makes almost double what I make but he'd have no money saved. None. Then I see all these withdraws from the ATM. his explanations made no sense. His sex drive also started depleating. I'd question him and he'd flip. Then I caught him lying about where he was and his partner at work told me she saw a weird text from a dude I never heard of asking if he's still coming by.

So I drug tested him I actually ordered tests and he passed I was shocked. He told me some story about how he owed a dealer money from back in the day but was too emvarassed to tell me. The whole story stunk to me but I just trusted him. But the money kept disappearing. Finally he admitted it he's been taking thirties ..(30mg oxycodone) a serious narcotic pain killer. The ones he basically ruined his life with then later switched to heroin. I did them for years too they are basically heroin in a pill. Also they're 30 a piece.

I was devastated DEVASTATED! I wasn't sure how he passed the drug tests I figured I just tested him in the middle of a few days where he hasent used.

So here's the first time I caught him

Then again a few days later I caught him cause I had a feeling and I used so interrogation tactics he outed himself.

Few days after that I find out again I notice more missing money, and more lies

Then I'm like how the hell is he passing these tests. Here I bought the wrong ones that don't test for oxy. So I buy the right ones. Test him ... and he knew I was testing him with different tests...

he failed. I lost my mind. He lied at first and said it was from last week but I'm not stupid. He eventually said ok the last one he did was this morning.

Basically 12 midnight I'm walking my pregnant ass down rt 1 a highway, smoking a cigarette (I know I feel terrible now) screaming at the top of my longs telling him to leave me and my daughter alone as he follows behind slow in his car demanding I get in. What a mess

Then I tell my mom everything and I felt bad I usually tell me mom everything we're very close but I kept this to myself. She then shows me texts from him from last week

Now he's swearing up and down he's done and this times different and he can't live without me. Idk what to do

I'm so lost. I feel like my soul has been ripped from my body

UPDATE

So after this he PROMISED he was done and my mom told me she'd been talking to him and she believes him. So I told him I had no commitment with him until he proves himself and I didn't want to even see him until he could pass a drug test. I told him to stay away which he did. Last night we met up and he passed! He's also been only using our debit card, no withdraws. He even sent me a picture of a bonus check he got that he didn't even have to tell me about when he got it. He also passed again tonight. So far so good but we have a long way to go. My trust is completely non existent even with these improvements. I just hope he stays on the right path. I told him as long as he's honest with me I will support him but lying I won't stand for.

Oh PS I haven't gotten anything for myself in months and since he's had a party for god knows how long I decided I owed it to myself. I spent his bonus on my hair and nails 💁🏼