Hi friends. Let’s talk about how eating disorders are real & terrifying. & how there are dead beat mom’s & amazing dad’s out there.

So, I’m 5’9” & I used to be overweight. I was about 210 pounds when I was 14. This was truly because my mother did not care for me. She would constantly tell me to heat up pizza’s in the microwave & that was my dinner. I tried to workout, but since I was 14 & couldn’t drive to the gym. My mom took me to the gym once my freshman year of high school (I asked her all the time to take me). My mom was doing drugs, & selling them out of my house a lot due to my step dad at the time. She would bring random men into the house all the time while she was married, & they would hit on me all the time, & she found it flattering. I did not have the best mom ever. She did nothing but make me eat foods horrible for me, & there was nothing healthy in the house I lived in so i couldn’t do anything about it. So I took it into my own hands.

After my freshman year, I ran away to my dad’s. It was a surprise for my dad because I showed up on his door step, & he cried because I only had one bag of clothes & my cat. I said “Dad I’m tired of living this way. I want to move in please”. I’ve only seen my dad cry once, & that’s when my parents were going through divorce. He told me he was going to get me into soccer, & I’ve always wanted to play for high school. I played in middle school, so i was so excited. Soccer was a huge part of my life after I moved in with my dad. Me & my dad went to the gym everyday 7 days a week. I busted my ASS to get to a healthy weight. And I did. I was healthy & happy at 145 pounds.

Disaster struck for me. I moved schools. I lost my mother because we never talked anymore. Her husband was put in jail. I lost my childhood home because she got evicted. I lost all my things in that house because my mom didn’t care enough to get my things, & my childhood pictures & toys my dad wanted to keep. & my grandpa was diagnosed with cancer. It sunk in after the summer of my freshman year. I was a sophomore in high school. I had my first boyfriend, & he cheated on me. I resorted to anorexia nervosa & bulimia nervosa. I weighed 110 pounds at my smallest. I was sickly skinny. I looked so unhealthy. No one knew I was struggling with this. My dad didn’t know. Not even my best friend knew until I collapsed at soccer practice one day. I had an irregular heart beat for a while because of the bulimia.

I finally had a breakthrough. I knew I was unhealthy. I knew I needed to start eating again & stop purging. It was so bad for my health. You can see in the picture above how small my legs were & I just looked like I was broken. I was broken, but I used that to my advantage. I made it my strength & I tell my story now to make other’s realize they’re not alone. I’m 19 years old now. I’m a sophomore in college now, & I’m now 145 pounds again.

My dad is my number one supporter. My mom has tried to reach out to me, but i can’t forgive her for some of the things she has said to me. She would call me a burden sometimes because she couldn’t afford to feed me because she lost her job due to my step Dad. I workout 5 days a week now, & I’m healthy as can be again.

& also if you were wondering... I BECAME A COLLEGIATE SOCCER PLAYER!!!! So hard work pays off. I couldn’t believe that the fat girl from freshman year of high school would turn into a collegiate soccer player. I did transfer to UNCC due to the fact I tore my tendon in my right ankle my senior year of high school. I got it healed, but college soccer players are vicious & if they see a brace on an ankle, they will attack. I kept getting injured over & over again because of it. It just wasn’t worth the pain I was in all the time & I went to Brevard college because I wanted to play soccer. So I transferred, & joined DZ & I love it. I hope this story will somehow help someone someday. & I hope people will realize there are dead beat mom’s too & amazing dad’s out there. I love my dad. He’s the number one person in my life. I hope people realize that eating disorders are awful, & don’t decide to struggle alone like I did. Thank you for reading this long story if you took time out of your day to read it.