Ok a little back story here. My boyfriend and I are 13 years apart and we work together at a hospital on the same unit, that's where we met. He is a nurse and I am a patient care technician, which is just a fancy name for an uncertified nursing assistant. I don't make much but I make enough to get by with a few roommates. But since he won't let me pay any bills I've been helping my mom out and I had to borrow $180 from him to help until next paycheck which was like 5 days away. That bit of info will come up later.

Last month he suggested that I move back in with my parents to motivate me to go back to school. I haven't been back to school because I don't know what I want to do yet and I don't believe in racking up debt just to figure it out. I'm not upset with him for that suggestion because it was coming from a good place, he wants to see me be as successful as he knows I can be I'm not going to fault him for that. I have since moved out of his house and back in with my parents.

Now I haven't told anyone about this save for my older sister and she's in Florida. But now people are asking if we're still together and if everything is ok between us. And he's walking around on his high horse (nose in the air looking down one me) giving me these smug smiles like he did when we were on a break. Like there's some game and he's winning. That infuriating 👇🏿

One of my coworkers who I'm like semi close to (we talk but it's nothing too personal) told me that she knows what's going on with us. That everyone on the unit knows, that he's been announcing it at the front desk and giving everybody updates and stuff. And I'm like what?

She then went on to tell me she was upset I didn't tell her but it wasn't any of her business or anyone else's for that matter. She told me what he's been saying. Basically that he gave me an ultimatum (which he didn't) that I could stay quit my job and go to school and he'd do everything for me or leave and stay with my parents and that I just got up packed my shit and left. What he really said was: I don't want you to go you have to understand that. But I think it would motivate and be better if you did. I let you stay here because I liked having you around but if you aren't going to go to school and you aren't going to help out financially, then I think you should go.

K, I'll admit it hurt when he said he liked having me around like I was a stray animal and he just let me sleep on the porch until I found an owner. Secondly he never let me help out financially because he could afford it. And I should save my money. So, I started helping my mom out and, it's a whole other story but my dad's been racking up some debt in her name. She wanted me to pay the cellphone bill. Lol ok look I know you're thinking the cellphone bill shouldn't cost a lot but it does. It's $700-$400 monthly bill from AT&T; and I don't even know why it costs so much it's ridiculous the amount of hidden fees there are. So right there I'm like ok I'm good on the helping out.

It's right after Christmas and just before an unexpected flight to Jamaica for my uncles funeral. And my mom is texting me over wifi we have iPhones) that the phones are off and she's worried because what if my grandmother is trying to get in touch or what if work needs us for something. Look, I just paid $400 on the phone bill so I'm thinking how are they off and I try to call my sister sure enough they're off. Again no idea why. My mom pays $360 on it and I don't have any money left so I ask him if he could hold me over until payday which is in 5 days. I never ask him for money. He says ok and doesn't seem bothered by it so I thank him and tell my mom not to worry about it. Payday comes and I pay him back. No worries. Right?

Why am I being told that he's been saying he can't stay with me because I couldn't even pay a $180 phone bill. How could he? And at work? Nah something ain't right.

I already plan on confronting him about it. I haven't yet. But my question is how should I go about it. Since he's been saying that I could stay there and he'd take care of everything should I? Or should I break up with him like my pride is saying? Should I stay get a free ride and go to school or should I leave him?

UPDATE: Thank you all for the advice, whether it was kind or not, it was helpful. I appreciate the support.

I'm not going to go into details about my finances though the last minute plane tickets and lodgings wiped me out. I tried to talk to him that didn't go over well. He started avoiding me. I don't know if he doesn't want to lose me and knows that I'm frustrated, or if he's just being a guy and avoiding that confrontation. Dunno I thought about just ending it over a text but that didn't feel right.

Instead I spoke to my older sister about it she said don't do anything and if he comes back we talk if not I'll be ok. I'm going to try that and do what I've been doing and focus on me.

I worked with him this weekend it was a lot like this

Except neither of us looked back. At least I didn't.

Anyways thanks again guys.