Things to consider prior to TTC?

Question

My boyfriend and I have just began talking about the possibility of TTC. We’ve been discussing it for about two weeks now and we think we’ve talked about everything, but we’d like to make sure we’ve considered everything. 
So, ladies, what are the most important things to consider prior to TTC? What would be dealbreakers for you or what would convince you that you can do it?

Answer

I’m going to be honest here. I found out during my first pregnancy about the tests for downs etc. When our doctor asked us whether we wanted the tests done, in unison my husband and I gave different answers. I said yes because then we could make an informed decision. He said no because it didn’t matter to him what the Baby had it was still part of us both. I know this sounds strange but for a few weeks it was a big bone of contention - but you need to think about these things too 🤷‍♀️

Answer

Things you can discuss are. What will do if you don't fall pregnant and what timescale. is IVF or adoption a route you would go down.  who is doing the night feeds. or how will they be shared.  How and when will you announce the pregnancy and birth.  who will be present at the birth. how long do you intend to take off of work.  I found some great articles on this online.  best of luck on your ttc journey.

Answer

He needs to know and understand how much work you’ll be putting into (if you choose to) tracking your cycle to get pregnant. And when you do get pregnant how supportive will he be? Symptoms can start early long before you’re visibly pregnant and can and most likely will effect your day to day life. Will he be there helping you find foods that don’t aggravate your nausea or will he be the calling you lazy and whiny? Not trying to say you have a bad boyfriend that’s just two ends of the spectrum I’ve seen. Does he understand that just because you’re the woman doesn’t mean that you’re the only one responsible for child care? 
I think it’s really important to have a frank conversations about 1. How he views pregnant women. 2. How you both view parental roles. 3. If something does come up during your pregnancy are you going to terminate or keep the baby. Are y’all on the same page about it? 4. How are you raising your child? Do you agree on views of spanking or not spanking? 5. If you’re two different religions which are you raising the child in?  These are just a few questions that I think are best to air out before having a baby. Too often I’ve seen things unsaid and then couples have huge blowouts later because they had totally opposite view points. No to say people can’t grow and change their minds but it’s best to lay it on the table early so there are no surprises later. 
Good luck!

Things to consider prior to TTC?

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