Losing my mind

I have a three year old with mild autism and he never listens to me! He's nonverbal so communication is difficult and it seems like he doesn't understand me or doesn't care what I'm saying. He listens to his father but with me he is a terror. The past couple nights I've been so emotionally and physically drained that I'm crying and my anxiety is through the roof. Do any other moms of special needs children have any suggestions as to how to deal with/improve his behavior?