this time we thought was going to be it, me and my bf were planning family vacations, the nursery design he was even wanting to help plan the baby shower lol, but then at 11 weeks i started spotting, i called my dr and they gave he an emergency ultrasound. they couldnt find my baby, she questioned uf i was really pregnant (as i had not yet had my 1st ultrasound, my appt was the following week). she ordered blood work and told me if the bleeding increased, go to the ER. in 2 days, on a sunday, the bleeding did increase, at about 3 that morning after my bf came home from work. he took me straight to the ER and after 5 hours, they told me what my gut was already telling me, i was having a miscarriage. i balled all the way home, my bf said nothing, i glanced over at him once, to see his eyes red and damp, his jaw clenched, he was holding back tears, he was trying to stay strong for me. i completely stopped bleeding, i was so confused, until this morning, i thought my bf left a water bottle on the bed and maybe it leaked, my shorts were soaked and the sheets too, i turned on the flashlight cause i thought maybe i was bleeding again, but no, it was water. i, confused, went to the restroom to pee, but i was bleeding so much and i swear i felt the baby pass, i immediately started crying again, i showered and went back to bed, telling my bf, i dont think i can go to work, so he sighed and hugged me and said ok, hes out with the dogs now, but before he left he said to me, "i dont want to try anymore" it hurt so bad hearing that, but i understand, this was the 2nd time this has happened, at least the 1st time i didnt know i was pregnant, this time , this time it hurt. deep down i do want a baby,more than anything, but i feel the same, why try again, it all ends the same.