😔 where do I start?? I guess I’ll start with a little back story I’m 26, happily married with 2 children 7 and 2 and currently trying for #3 for over a year now and I’m in school for nursing.... March 17, 2017 I took a pregnancy test. It was positive and I was so happy finally I thought we are pregnant... two days later March 19, 2017 I lost the baby... I have no idea how far along I was I guessed around 5 weeks mayb e... I had had a chemical pregnancy and it hit me hard like really hard!! I cried for weeks. Finally I got myself together and we started trying again. Month after month after month of disappointment .... so many negative test... I was starting to feel like it would never happen... March of this year I finally decided to but the $30 clear blue ovulation kit from Walmart the one that tells you if your ovulating with the smiley faces.... thinking there is no way we could miss my ovulation day this time.... I got my “peak” and we did the do the day before the day of and the day after.... skip a few weeks I took a text on April 7th saw a very very faint line and my heart started racing.... finally!! But I didn’t let my self get to excited I told my self I would test again the next day just to make sure... so I did and I got the same thing a faint line... so I said ok I’ll wait a couple more days and text again the line should be darker right? By this point I have worked myself up thinking I’m finally pregnant and start thinking of baby names, how I’m going to do the nursery, how to tell my kids that they are going to have another sibling, how I’m going to tell my and my husbands family....Well this morning I go to take another test and as I’m going to pee on the stick I see blood 😤😤😤 so I just take the test anyway and I start cramping.... so I think ok some women have periods while pregnant maybe I’m one of those women.... so I wait 5 mins for the text to finish and NOTHING..... I keep looking at the test and I can still see a very very faint line and at this point I’m thinking ok maybe there isn’t a line and I just imagining it... at this point I’m done trying to have another baby... I think that we should take a break for a few months and maybe start again next year hell maybe the year after.... I keep thinking that this is sign that we should wait... maybe it’s just now our time to have another baby.... maybe God doesn’t think we are ready... maybe this is a sign that I need to finish nursing school first and then try again... or maybe my body just isn’t ready!! Man it feels so good to get all of this out!! I kind of feel a little bit better after letting this all out!! I know this is long and maybe a little boring to read but I just needed to let this out!!