Worrying ourselves Sick

So a little intro to our story...my husband and I tried to start a family for 4 years, 1 year of infertility treatments and finally after taking HCG trigger shots, metformin, and Letrozole conceived our son! We couldn't be happier! We always dreamed of having a family and starting our own family tree with kids and grandkids and great grandkids someday! We were both 27 when our son was born and he has been our whole world ever sense!

I got to stay home with him for the first 3 months. I had trouble breastfeeding, so he was formula fed. When I went back to work, my husband starting staying home with our son. This was not the plan back in the day. I always dreamed about being a stay at home mom, but my career took off and my husbands didn't, so it make financial sense for him to not work. They have been at home together for 2 years now.

My son is an energetic little boy! He started saying mama at 6 months old. He started walking at 11 months old. He loves to run and has pretty strong motor skills. He is all about "how does this work" He takes to adults pretty quickly. He is rarely around other kids or away from either me or my husband.

You can probably imagine how my heart sunk at his 2 year pediatric appointment when they said "okay let's take the autism Eval again, given his test scores at 18 months. This was right after my son refused to corporate with an eye exam. (He always throws at fit at the doctors office). We had no idea he scored badly at 18 months. We knew he wasn't talking as much as other kids, but everyone kept saying oh he is just a boy! They always talk later. Well we of course started questioning the pediatrician. And she asked well what are you doing For speech therapy? We were shocked! This was the first she mentioned it. We got a list of ST's and went home completely overwhelmed.

It's really just my husband and I in all this. We don't have any close friends or family who know anything about kids. We have been on 3 dates since my son was born. It's so hard without a good support system! Which is why I'm in tears I'm so happy to have found this group! I want to help support you all as well face these similar challenges with our wonderful children!

I won't lie, my husband and I worry sick day in and day out about our son! Are we doing enough? What's wrong with him? Is he acting out because he is 2 or something else? How are we going to afford all the ST? How do we support each other? Will he grow out of it? What if he doesn't? Where do we find the patience to wait to find out?

I'm not ready for my son to be labeled! What if I failed him because I left him watch tv too young and he is delayed because of that over stimulation and not a disorder? How do I fix this?

So many question, so much worried and pain. I love my little man with all my heart and just want him to have the very best!