Not sure how to feel

So I have an 11 year old, not with my partner. I have actively spent the last 11 years trying not to get pregnant- I am militant with my birth control, track my ovulation and won't have sex 3 days before or after. My partner and I recently decided to "start trying" aka no birth control or tracking and if it happens it happens. I've had two periods since then and each one has made me more and more depressed, and I don't know how to feel about it, I'm not even sure if it's how I really feel because my birth control has always affected my mental state and emotions severely, but I burst into tears in the bathroom today when my period started 2 days early. I'm pretty young so I'm not worried about not being able to conceive so I don't know what to think.