Hi Everyone, My husband and I have been trying for 18 months to get pregnant, and nothing. He got a sperm analysis and motility and amount was low. However, the doctor told us to just keep trying that we are probably just stressed out. I am really starting to feel heartbroken at not being able to be a parent. I am ashamed that I am failing at becoming a mother and have only told one person who was very kind about it luckily. My husband however, told my mother in law who has since then not even talked to me. I feel like she and everyone else equates my ability to carry a child with my worthiness as a person. I know that isn't really true, but it is twice as heartbreaking to struggle with accepting that we may not ever be parents while being rejected by his mother. I just can feel myself growing more and more bitter, and that too is heartbreaking. The world needs people who can carry love into the world now more than ever. I guess that is why infertility is extra heartbreaking to me. As parents we would have had the chance to mold the world into a place with children that could maybe be kinder and more accepting of others than our generation has shown itself to be. Instead I need to find the strength to pick myself up, shallow the bitterness, and use this experience of infertility to make life better somehow for someone. I hope that we all can. though right now I admit I am sad, bitter, and feel very much like half of a woman.