So this is really hard for me to talk about but I just feel so alone...So I have a boyfriend and me and him have been together for two years. I have tried so hard to keep our relationship going but for some reason I can’t get myself to be fully in love with him again, like I love him in a since that I care about him but I’m not in love with him. I just don’t feel that feeling anymore like he does. Also there is so much more that goes into this. I am a junior in high school, while also taking college classes at a community college, while doing volunteer hours, and working part time. He has dropped out of school, doesn’t want to get his GED, and is unemployed. I pretty much help provide for him as much as I can with paying for anything he wants, giving him rides, etc. I am also the most insecure person you will ever meet, I hate everything about myself, my hair, my face, skin color, anything. So when it comes to dating I kinda just settle.... you know “ get what you can get”. Don’t get me wrong I know he cares about me And he always expresses how much he loves me and although I say I love him to.... I just idk. I have also caught myself looking at other guys, but I know I’m not good enough or pretty enough for any of them. The last time me and my boyfriend broke up I was interested in this one guy and we talked for a little bit but he didn’t really give me a chance... so I felt so rejected and hideous so now I’m scared to break up with my boyfriend cause I don’t want to feel alone and I hate breaking his heart. Also me and my boyfriend have been fighting a lot recently because he gets very jealous of someone even looks at me. For example we went to the movies and the worker smiled at me and my boyfriend blew up and ran out the door. Or if a guy likes my photo on fb he gets so pissed and blows up. It has come to the point where I just don’t care anymore, right now i don’t care about me anymore And I have just devoted myself to do whatever he says and what he wants. I really just need some guidance and someone to talk to. I have recently started seeing a psychologist for my depression because there have been times when I have thought Sucidal. I just hate myself so much for feeling like this, and just everything. I have literally covered every mirror in my room, and bathroom cause every time I look at myself I just cry, that goes for taking any kind of pictures. When I look at myself I see a hideous monster that I just wanna go away. I have expressed my insecurities to my boyfriend ( besides the me not being in love with him as much) he doesn’t understand depression and anxiety no matter how much I try to explain it. He tries to tell me I’m beautiful everyday and he genuinely cares but it’s just so hard and I feel so guilty. I feel like I’m such a terrible person. I understand not everyone is gorgeous in this world and I’m just one of those people. I am trying to fall in love with my boyfriend again, I just keep thinking that this is all I can get and he’s who I’m supposed to be with so I should be grateful to have him and in a way I am. I just need advice.... please and I know many of you will think I’m a terrible person because I feel that way to but please any advice on what I should do.