What’s wrong with me

I constantly feel guilty for things I do even if I’ve apologized 5 times. I obsess over small incidents that happened years ago that the other people wouldn’t even remember or think is even a big deal but I hate myself for it. I’ve thought about suicide, I’d never do it or hurt myself but I do think that people would be happier if I wasn’t here. I am constantly trying to please people and everyone hates me and I just hate myself