Something is wrong with me !!

Honestly.. I don’t even know! I met this guy like 5 months ago but he of course doesn’t live here so he went back, of course that’s my life and I was so damn into him I even imagined leaving where I’m at to go to him!! But when he left he never ended up reaching out to me so 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ but I’ve been so into this other guy since this last summer and

He’s really my type, I’m into like white , dirty blondes, soft eyed , gentlemen sorta kinda awkward nerdy type but still like damn gets you wet as hell!!!!!! Idk but that’s just what I’m mostly attracted to . BUT he’s younger than me !!! So I always think what if we were to hook up would he be as experienced as I am ?? Would he know how to treat me the way I like?? He would probably be hella nervous and shy but idk I can’t seem to stop wanting to jump on him!