Break up

Change is hard. My boyfriend and I broke up today. We’ve lived together for a year and been in each other’s lives for 12 years. We realized that our futures were going in different directions and that when we pictured it we wanted different things. We’ve been drifting apart for some time. It feels like the right decision but it’s such a painful one. I love him and this isn’t what I wanted but we can’t think of any changes that would fix the big problems. He’s already making plans to move out (I own the house). I heard him on the phone talking about it and I’m just heartbroken. I’ve tried to sleep to escape it but I keep waking up panicking with an overwhelming feeling of sadness. I know from experience that these feelings will fade but right now they feel unbearable.