Does anyone else not like being a mom?

Question

I am struggling to see what’s so great about this. My son is 3 weeks old and I can’t wait for people to visit so I can hand him over. I don’t think I have PPD I think I just genuinely mourn my previous life and would give anything to have it back. I’m awful for feeling this way aren’t I...?

Accepted Answer

Please talk about this with your doc as it is very likely ppd. You don't have to do this alone

Answer

I felt the same way the first 4 weeks of my daughter’s life. Dont feel bad, don’t feel like you shouldnt be a mother or you should put your baby up for adoption. What you are feeling IS normal for SOME people. No one’s adjustment into motherhood is exactly the same. For me I felt like I was on one side of a canyon with all these other moms who purée baby food and never forgot the diaper bag and always had their shit together. And on the other side are single, feminist women who had spontaneous sex lives and time to get their hair cut and go out on week nights. And I felt like I was on the wrong side, that I didn’t belong as a mom, but I couldnt jump back over to the old me.  It sounds immature but motherhood is a big shock for everyone and we all cope differently. Now I love being a mom more than anything; so often I think about how much better my life is with my family. You WILL settle into motherhood, but in the meantime, keep taking advantage of people coming over. There’s nothing wrong with needing help. You’re doing a great job, mama! 😘 (ps hope you relate to my weird analogies 😂)

Answer

I felt similar and never had ppd. I always wanted to hand him over and felt a bit desperate to have some of myself back. BUT I was concerned for my son and wanted him to be safe, etc, and I think that’s what’s most important here. If you don’t trust yourself with your baby’s safety, then you will need help. But otherwise, it WILL get better and you will sleep again and your baby won’t always need to be held and soon enough it’ll be talking and laughing and others can help more. Hang in there!

Answer

I don't want to make you feel bad but what do you mean you'd give anything to have your previous life back? like life before baby? you'd give anything? ANYTHING to have it back? bc if youd give anything then maybe consider adoption or something bc that's the only way youd have it back? maybe you're just over worked and need a break. have a night out without baby. I just dont see this as being a very rational post...

Answer

I hard a hard time the first couple of months. It's not unreasonable to miss your old life when things are so hard and you are tired and still getting used to caring for baby. It also took a couple of months for me to feel bonded with my baby but once she started smiling socially and being more of a personality it got better for me. I understand how you feel and it will get better.

Answer

The feeling will change with time , it’s just all so new right now and you don’t really know how to deal with it. Don’t feel bad for thinking like this I feel like it’s almost like a natural reaction.

Answer

How old are you?

Answer

I felt exactly this way when my son was a newborn. Baby blues and PPD were the culprits for feeling this way. My son was a horrible sleeper, still is, plus was colic so it was extremely rough in the beginning. But it gets better. I never thought it would but trust me, it does. Maybe slowly but eventually this will pass.

Answer

Are you getting sleep? My baby didn’t start sleeping through the night until she was 7 months old. Which meant I was up every 1.5-2 hours during the night. I hated everything.. I hated life.. I was constantly annoyed with my baby... and she is a good, happy baby. I just didn’t realize how much lack of sleep effected me. It has only been 3 weeks. I cried non stop the first 3 weeks. Your hormones probably haven’t leveled out this quick. If you think you have PPD, definitely talk to a doctor. I am an anxiety prone person, so I knew that wasn’t my case. I would say it takes time to bond with your baby, and unless you are wanting to harm yourself or your baby, give yourself a break, and time. I wish I did that for myself. I barely remember my daughter as a newborn because I was so stressed out and emotional. Also a rough delivery and recovery doesn’t help. 
I can’t stand the thought of my life with out her now. She is everything to me. Give yourself a break, momming is hard.

Answer

I felt like this too. It’s a very big adjustment. I found the sleep deprivation affected my mood about the baby a lot. It will get easier.

Does anyone else not like being a mom?

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