Hi mamas! I gave birth to my handsome boy, Mateo Daniel, on April 12 at 38+1. 6lbs 2oz and 19 in of perfection. My due date was April 25 but I was induced due to gestational hypertension. My bp had been fluctuating from normal to high since around 32w so I was seeing the perinatal specialists twice weekly as well as seeing my midwife weekly. I also dealt with pre term contractions since 28w and was on nifedipine up until 36w. Needless to say I was already a regular at l&d; and SUPER anxious to meet my baby boy.

I went in for my weekly appointment with my midwife on 4/11 at 9 am at 38w exactly. I was still 1cm, thick and high. My bp was elevated so they sent me to l&d; to be monitored. My bp stayed consistently high and they made the decision to induce around 1pm.

At 6pm they inserted cervidil. I started to get crampy after about an hour and was able to relax and rest until around 3 am when the contractions started to get more intense. My plan was to go natural so I requested the birthing ball to help me move through the contractions. At 6 am the cervidil was taken out and I was still only at 1cm after hours of painful contractions. Next we tried cytotec.

After a few more hours of pain with no progress my midwife decided to insert the balloon catheter. My water broke as they inserted the catheter and that's when shit got real. At this point I couldn't stay still or quiet through the contractions. I began moaning through the contractions and tried several methods of coping naturally. I took a hot shower and tried to walk around between contractions but standing was almost unbearable. By 1pm the catheter came out and I was at 6cm. Since I was progressing so quickly my midwife decided to let my body do its thing without pitocin.

My body was getting tired and my will to cope naturally was depleting. I asked about my options and I decided to try the laughing gas. This did absolutely nothing for the pain and was only making me more sleepy. After about 15 minutes of the gas I gave it up and got back on my ball. It was then that I had convinced myself I couldn't do it naturally. I needed some relief.

I felt so defeated and I was disappointed in myself for resorting to intervention. I was completely against fentanyl and I really didn't want an epidural but I asked for them anyway several times. My midwife came in each time I was giving in and gave me the most amazing pep talks. She massaged my back through contractions and helped me relax and breathe through the contractions. She never tried to talk me out of the drugs and she was supportive of whatever I decided but she knew what I wanted and she gave me the confidence to soldier on.

At 9 cm I couldn't take it anymore and I was ready to push. The contractions were painful but pushing him out was so much more intense. Not pain wise but as far as how hard my body was working. My husband and mother in law held my legs and cheered me on. I will never forget seeing my baby's head crowning and the determination I felt to give my all in those last few pushes to have him in my arms. After only 15 minutes of pushing from start to finish my sweet boy was on my chest. I immediately forgot about all the pain I had just gone through and everything else in that moment was a blur except for my baby's face.

He will be a month old next week and I still find myself reliving his birth in my head every day. It was the most beautiful experience ever and I am so grateful that my midwife believed in me and had the patience to help me achieve the natural birth that I wanted. God is good and my boy is beautiful.