new relationship..

i just recently started a relationship. we didn’t have sex until after we started dating so i didn’t get to test drive the car before i bought it. anyways... he’s kind of smaller than the guys i usually sleep with. i don’t really enjoy sex with him. and he completely killed my insides while fingering me. it’s like he was trying to murder something inside of my vagina?!?!? and sometimes he tries talking dirty to me in person and i actually get grossed out. i don’t know what to do because this has never happened to me before. he knows i was practically addicted to sex before him and me not having sex with him is making him insecure. i told him it wasn’t because of him and gave him a really good reason why i’m not having sex with him but i really hate to lie to him. but i’m also a firm believer that you can’t be with someone that you can’t have sex with... :/