Rambling and a cat

​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​Here, have a cat as this shit isn't going to be very fun to talk about. So I just turned 20, am in my junior year of college, and I realized I needed help after my suicide attempt in February and my best friends actual suicide in March. I went to the school‘s therapist I had gone to before, and completely failed my Japanese and History (which I took twice and failed). Stopped going tto the therapist because I started feeling scared and sadder. recently, After retaking the history in a two week class , I just learned that I failed again to a mistype in an essay. Can’t tell my parents I’ve failed because im already a failure of a freeloader tovthem (who does pay bills to them, college is just expensive, I don’t have scholarships and I can’t afford to move) I guess I’m just sad and need to vent because trusting the people in my life has gotten me nowhere , and im scared to go back to my therapist because she’ll try to talk to me about it and I can’t . I’m just scared right now, and rambling . If you read this im sorry, hope you’re having a great day